Kidversation: Conversation that only makes sense in the world of children or that only children can get away with. (Apparently it isn't an original idea because if you google it, all sorts of stuff comes up...)

"Sonya, this is Jilly Bowl," Lily told her friend as I turned on the song "Piano Man" on the way to church.

"Lily, it's Billy Joel, silly girl," I corrected her.

"Oh, right, Billy Joel," she said. "Don't you like him?" she asked her friend. "Mom, turn on the part where he says he learns to dance with his hands in his pants." She laughed to herself.

I turned it to the right song while the girls listened quietly for the exact phrase Lily wanted her friend to hear.

When the line finished, Lily announced, "I just love Jelly Ball!"

Oooh, so close!


So, I had 6 kids in my truck: Liam and Solomon, Lily and her friend Sonya, Madeline and Matt. We were driving Matt and Sonya home and the kids were engaged in conversation about Madeline and Lily's upcoming trip. They were leaving the next morning to go to Pittsburgh with Kurt for a long weekend and the car was busting at the seams with excitement....well, at least the girls were and it seemed to be contagious. Oh, and I failed to mention, Madeline was bringing home her new pet fish that her class no longer needed as a class pet....Oh, wait just a moment....did you hear that? Listen carefully.....that is the sound of my parents laughing...at me. I can hear it now: "First a cat, now a fish....and so it begins." This is good old fashioned karma....

Anyway, I was not paying too much attention until I heard Madeline say:

"It's ok if our fish dies because we'll just see him again in heaven one day."

"Mom, do animals go to heaven?" Lily asked.

"Yes, Lily. There is an Am-i-nal Heaven," Madeline answered her. "What should I call my fish? Oh, I know. We'll call it Little Dot," she said. (Little Dot was the name of a cat that the kids really liked and wanted to bring home from the shelter so that Leroy would have a friend. We've considered reuniting them again, at the shelter...) Little Dot is a fitting name though....like the little dot the fish will make in the water when it takes it's final plunge into the toilet....or the little dot it will leave on the ground if it accidentally flies out the window by some unknown force....or the little dot of tarter sauce it would need to have any taste at all, all half a bite of it....

"Yeah, and you can call it Orangey for short," Matt said. Such an original nickname for the very orange goldfish though I am pretty sure "Little Dot" doesn't shorten to "Orangey." Yet everyone agreed: Little Dot would also be known as Orangey.

As I spaced out, thinking about Madeline's persistent mispronunciation of animal and how I couldn't say the word ambulance or deodorant until, well, maybe just a few weeks ago, I was brought back to the kidversation when I heard Madeline promising to bring Sonya a dolphin back from her trip because she was sure a dolphin would be a good pet.

"Well, I know what a king cobra is," Sonya replied. "My sister learned about them in school. It's a snake," she said. I wondered if she was listening to the same conversation that I was.

"Maybe you could bring me back a worm," Matt chimed in, bringing it back to the list of pets no one should ever have much less take with them on an airplane. "I'd like an earthworm," he said.

"Well, I want a worm instead of a dolphin," Sonya said. "But, I just want a plain worm, not an earthworm."

"I know why suckers are called suckers," Matt said (and now for something totally different....again..) "It's because you suck on it."

"I could also bring back red worms instead. They are like little baby worms and are red," Madeline told them having learned about worms in school this year, obviously in great detail....

"Yeah, I want a red worm," Matt told her.

"Well, I just want a regular worm, Madeline," Sonya said. I started wondering if I needed to notify Kurt to keep the girls out of the yard in PA, or at least to be on guard if they ask for containers on their way outside. Then I thought, nah, it'd be pretty funny if they actually tried to bring worms back, hee hee.

But the best car-talk was today. I was driving the kids into school this morning when Lily screamed out: "LIAM! It's MY TURN to find YOU! Now STOP COUNTING and HIDE."

I looked into my mirror and saw Lily and Liam both with hands over their eyes.

"One, two, three, four..." Lily began.

Liam followed suit: "Fi, sic, sev...."

"LIAM! It's NOT. YOUR. TURN! STOP COUNTING!" Lily screamed, throwing back her head of wild hair so she was facing the ceiling.

"Lily, are you trying to play hide and seek while strapped into your seat, in the car?" I asked calmly, recalling a very funny Louis C.K. skit about hide and seek....not appropriate for this blog yet somehow very fitting....(please only view if you are not offended by profanity!)

"Yes and it is MY turn to find him, not his turn," she said. Then turning back to Liam, "Now let's try again."

This time, Lily counts while both kids cover their eyes. She gets to ten, hands fly off her eyes and she immediately squeals, "FOUND YA!" He throws his arms out wide giggling. Ta-da! (Oh how I wish fun stayed that simple!)

"Ok, your turn Liam," she said, hands hiding her face.

Now, all this ride needs is a little Jelly Ball singing Organ Woman and we'll be all set.

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