Screature

A little chicken humor for your viewing: Cluck of the Bells

If I ever own chickens, you know I will try this at home....

And, as usual, I can kind of relate to that clueless chicken in the back of that whatever you want to call it. You see, our three-year-old, Lily, asked for two things for Christmas. There she sat on Santa's lap in the middle of the mall mid-December and told him all she wanted for Christmas was noodles.

Noodles.

More specifically, she wanted "cheesy" noodles. Nothing more, nothing less.

"Oh, and Screature," she added, as if perhaps she needed a back up plan.

Now, we didn't hear this exchange take place mind you, but she repeated it enough in the days leading up to Christmas that we understood that her life would be complete if she received some cheesy noodles ("oh, and Screature") from Santa.

Christmas morning was a wonderful, exciting time in our house. The kids eagerly opened their presents and Lily was thrilled to find a 5-pack of Mac-n-Cheese in her loot as well as her new best friend Screature. I know, I know, you are sitting there asking yourself: What exactly is Screature? Well, let me introduce you to Screature. (You have to click the link....and make sure to scroll through the pictures for the full effect...)

So, she carries Screature around as if he were a soft, sweet bunny and she tries to snuggle with him in bed at night. Yet, when you meet him, he bites and snaps at you, and growls his terrible growl and laughs his evil laugh. He's kind of like something right out of the book Where the Wild Things Are. (For the record, they are here.)

Ok, I must get to the point. The one thing Screature can do that the kids didn't know he could do was squirt water from his mouth. Without water, he simply rears up on his hind legs, does his Fighting Fish impression and makes some noise. With water, he completely sprays you down. So, I thought it would be really funny if I secretly filled him up with water so that when the kids were playing with him they'd get a huge wet surprise. Nothing can go wrong there, right?

So when the moment presented itself, I turned him over, opened him up and tried to fill him with water. The water ran through his poor little body and out the other end. Thinking surely I just missed, I tried again. Same effect. So then I get the bright idea of reading the directions. Doh. You are supposed to fill the tank, after you take the tank out, which is the only way you can get water in it to begin with, had I paid any attention at all to the details. Furthermore, getting the rest of him wet KILLS HIM!

So, there I was, a drenched and broken Screature in hand, roaring my terrible roar and rolling my terrible eyes. How could I go from the kid who would read EVERY LAST WORD of the drug facts on anything in the medicine cabinet so that I didn't miss any valuable information to the mom who failed to read a simple set of directions, thus breaking the one tangible toy her kid wanted for Christmas?! Simple: because I am like that clueless chicken in the back row who just can't quite get it right. Thank goodness for grace. (I just hope there is enough for the rest of you guys because this chicken takes a pretty good helping of the supply!)

Needless-to-say, Kurt had to run out last night and take Screature to see the Screature "doctor." And what do you know...just like that (and $35 later) he was "like" new. Amazing!

Unfortunately, I can't say the same for the noodles. I'm just glad Lily is to blame on that one!