So, after taking some time away from sports, Aidan decided he wanted to try soccer again this year. Having played soccer at the collegiate level myself I was thrilled he wanted to take another shot at it. That thrill was mixed with complete dread about the hyper-competitiveness and intensity of other parents and coaches. But, Kurt volunteered to be the assistant coach and off we went, into soccer season on an under-8 team.
The season is underway and yesterday we took Kurt's parents to watch Aidan's soccer game. Each team has to provide one parent volunteer to be a line judge and since I was standing there, looking completely uninterested, I was given the task.
It was actually quite fun being a line judge, swearing the ball was hit off the other team when it wasn't (just kidding of course) and helping the kids get their throw-ins and corner kicks off. At first, I would try to give our boys some help as to where to throw the ball: "Look, Will is open. Throw it to him." But after a while, I realized I needed to say only two things: "Keep your feet behind the line, no, not on the line, behind the line..." and "Keep your feet on the ground when you throw."
This was accentuated by a throw-in that took place by the opposing team. The ball had gone out right past mid-field on our end and the coach was telling the kid to throw it to Zack: "Look, Zack is down the field and open....throw it to Zack. Do you see Zack? Throw it to Zack. Are you listening? Throw it in already, TO ZACK!" At which point I am fairly certain the coach was jumping up and down on his head with his arms frantically waving in the air. So, the kid, looking like a deer stunned by headlights, contorts his entire body around, twisting it in some acrobatic-like way in order to throw the ball the totally opposite direction down towards their end of the field, (but hey, he had his feet behind the line and kept them on the ground!) One of our players took off with the ball and their coach, completely beside himself, made the mistake of asking: "Why did you throw it that way? What were you thinking?" To which his player replied: "Parker was open so I threw it to Parker."
Parker was their goalie. And over half a field away. And his throw went all of about 5 feet, maybe....
I about burst out laughing but seeing as how the coach looked like he may need therapy later, or at least some strong mixed drinks, I kept it together. And I will admit, he didn't appreciate it several such episodes later when I made the comment: "Maybe you ought to tell them the opposite of what you actually want to get them to do what you really want." He had words, in his heavily-European-accented voice, that didn't sound very amused....
At any rate, we can't talk much because by the end of the game, Aidan, who has shown much more promise this year of at least being interested in playing soccer, asked Kurt to please take him off the field because his leg hurt. He limped over, holding his leg as if he had been severely injured. As soon as he was off the field, he sprinted the fifty yards to Liam who was practicing his walking on another soccer field. I am not certain which part of his leg was hurt but it certainly did not appear to be the running part!
Alas, such is the way with chickens, what can I say....
It was actually quite fun being a line judge, swearing the ball was hit off the other team when it wasn't (just kidding of course) and helping the kids get their throw-ins and corner kicks off. At first, I would try to give our boys some help as to where to throw the ball: "Look, Will is open. Throw it to him." But after a while, I realized I needed to say only two things: "Keep your feet behind the line, no, not on the line, behind the line..." and "Keep your feet on the ground when you throw."
This was accentuated by a throw-in that took place by the opposing team. The ball had gone out right past mid-field on our end and the coach was telling the kid to throw it to Zack: "Look, Zack is down the field and open....throw it to Zack. Do you see Zack? Throw it to Zack. Are you listening? Throw it in already, TO ZACK!" At which point I am fairly certain the coach was jumping up and down on his head with his arms frantically waving in the air. So, the kid, looking like a deer stunned by headlights, contorts his entire body around, twisting it in some acrobatic-like way in order to throw the ball the totally opposite direction down towards their end of the field, (but hey, he had his feet behind the line and kept them on the ground!) One of our players took off with the ball and their coach, completely beside himself, made the mistake of asking: "Why did you throw it that way? What were you thinking?" To which his player replied: "Parker was open so I threw it to Parker."
Parker was their goalie. And over half a field away. And his throw went all of about 5 feet, maybe....
I about burst out laughing but seeing as how the coach looked like he may need therapy later, or at least some strong mixed drinks, I kept it together. And I will admit, he didn't appreciate it several such episodes later when I made the comment: "Maybe you ought to tell them the opposite of what you actually want to get them to do what you really want." He had words, in his heavily-European-accented voice, that didn't sound very amused....
At any rate, we can't talk much because by the end of the game, Aidan, who has shown much more promise this year of at least being interested in playing soccer, asked Kurt to please take him off the field because his leg hurt. He limped over, holding his leg as if he had been severely injured. As soon as he was off the field, he sprinted the fifty yards to Liam who was practicing his walking on another soccer field. I am not certain which part of his leg was hurt but it certainly did not appear to be the running part!
Alas, such is the way with chickens, what can I say....
Karoline's second football practice/game is tonight, and while we had a BLAST "practicing" as a family a few nights ago, she claims she doesn't want to go back tonight because she "doesn't like it when the other kids try to take my flags." Hm. It's flag football. I told her if she runs no one will take her flag. Don't think it worked, but we'll see how tonight goes. She was also TOTALLY put out last week because she didn't have a water bottle. Threw that in my purse first thing this morning.
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